Has anyone else had to distinguish between things that are traditional and have some significance (a sporran, a sgian dhu) and something that is traditional, but has no known significance ( color of flashes, button shape, sock color) when discussing the kilt?

Ohh, I see, and what does it mean that the gentleman over there has a BLACK whatsit on top of his head? Is it because you have a red face and he has black whiskers?

I would imagine at some point, the young Duke of Argyll having to say something on the order of "Because I LIKE pink hose, that is why."

And I know that some newer tartan designs assign cosmic significance to the width and color of every thread ( and this one is for the wee lassies who used to laugh at me whiskers, and this one is for me dear sainted ma, and this is for the whisky I drink, but this is for the vomit...)