Military Rivalry Humor

[Bill aka Mole]

To the best of my recollection... From the US Navy's own Naval Rights and Responsibilities Workshop

"The reason that the four branches don't work well with one another is the fact that they each speak their own version of English. For example, the phrase, "Secure the building," will create four different scenarios:

♦ The Marines will determine the exact location of the building, request Naval Gunfire Support to pound the building in advance, and then assault the building from the front and the adjacent sides, leaving the rear clear of fire to allow the occupants an avenue of escape.

♦ The Army will establish interlocking fields of fire for machine guns nests, set up fire lanes in a 360 degree field around the building, place anti-personnel mines around the building. If available, they will have artillery support already dialed in to repel attackers and prepare to defend the building while still leaving an avenue for a rapid advance to the rear.

♦ The Navy will send a Third-Class Petty Officer (E-4) to ensure that the lights are turned off and all windows and doors are locked at the end of the work day.

♦ The Air Force will send a procurement officer out with instructions to gain a three year lease with option to buy."

PS: CameronCat: There is a rubuttal to the "Men's Department" line. The Marines have their few, good men: U.S. Navy Hospital Corpsmen! Not surprised that the good Commander didn't know this one, though. It is taught to the enlisted ranks only.