"... I felt fairly inconspicuous in my 'day casual' highland attire. THERE IS DEFINITELY A DIFFERENCE in how one is perceived while wearing traditional versus casual contemporary kilt garb. I will entertain the theory that part of it could be me, as in I might feel more comfortable in terms of my image when I am dressed in a more traditional fashion ..."

I think this is the way to deal with the relatives, too. If you wear your kilt with an easy confidence, people accept you. It is when you look nervous that people sense weakness and try to get you to fit their style preferences.