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7th November 15, 09:29 PM
#11
A plateau is a high form of flattery.
If you are too busy to laugh, you are too busy.
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7th November 15, 10:58 PM
#12
Anyone who doesn't wear a kilt should be tartan fettered.
Mark Anthony Henderson
Virtus et Victoria - Virtue and Victory
"I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be." - Douglas Adams
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8th November 15, 12:44 AM
#13
I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy .
Mike Montgomery
Clan Montgomery Society , International
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8th November 15, 02:53 AM
#14
One of the worst I have ever heard was of the Scotsman who swallowed a brick, and said "Ah'm awa'."
(Well, you did ask for it!)
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8th November 15, 04:44 AM
#15
Toward the end of his life Mohandas Ghandi, the former Indian prime minister, embraced one of the more ascetic forms of Hindu mysticism. He waked nearly everywhere he went, which caused the formation of remarkably thick and resilient callouses on his feet. His meager diet kept him perilously thin and frail and caused a side effect of severe bad breath.
Which of course means that he was a super-calloused fragile mystic cursed by halitosis.
'A damned ill-conditioned sort of an ape. It had a can of ale at every pot-house on the road, and is reeling drunk. "
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The Following 5 Users say 'Aye' to KD Burke For This Useful Post:
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8th November 15, 05:32 AM
#16
Where there's a will there's a relative.
or
I wanted to buy a camouflage shirt but I couldn't find one.
Whose coat is that jacket?
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8th November 15, 07:32 AM
#17
 Originally Posted by GrainReaper
nothing moooooves me like a splash of cowlogne on my face, I love the smell of fresh dairy-air!
"Hay", I have no "beef" with you and I don't mean to "milk" it. but this "cud" be the "cattle"yst for the worst cow puns ever "herd".
Originally Posted by Alan H
Some days you're the bat, some days you're the watermelon.
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8th November 15, 07:35 AM
#18
50 Shades of "Hay"....
Rev'd Father Bill White: Mostly retired Parish Priest & former Elementary Headmaster. Lover of God, dogs, most people, joy, tradition, humour & clarity. Legion Padre, theologian, teacher, philosopher, linguist, encourager of hearts & souls & a firm believer in dignity, decency, & duty. A proud Canadian Sinclair with solid Welsh and other heritage.
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8th November 15, 07:44 AM
#19
Musician to the audience: "We were going to play our seafood medley but we didn't know how to tuna fish."
"Simplify, and add lightness" -- Colin Chapman
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8th November 15, 07:50 AM
#20
Originally Posted by CameronCat
Musician to the audience: "We were going to play our seafood medley but we didn't know how to tuna fish."
I may not be able to tuna fish, but I know that halibut B Flat.
Originally Posted by Alan H
Some days you're the bat, some days you're the watermelon.
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