Your worst puns

[Profane James]

This one's making the rounds in my Facebook feed:

One night a Viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said, "it's going to rain."
His wife asked, "How do you know?"
"Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."

Waka Waka

[MNlad]

Two hunters, one from Germany and the other from the Czech Republic, were late returning to camp while on safari. The hunting guide and several other members of the party conducted a search and came upon a pride of lions who had obviously just enjoyed a rather large meal.

One of the party shot a lioness, and upon opening the now deceased animal discovered the hapless German. The party was all in favor of shooting the rest of the animals, sure that one of them had killed their other friend. The guide, however, said such extreme measures were not necessary and only one animal needed to be dispatched since it was obvious the Czech was in the male.

[tpa]

I did a theatrical performance about puns. Really it was just a play on words.

[GrainReaper]

Last night I had a dream I was working on a car, I was fixing dents, I started to float up and was looking down at myself fixing the car, I woke soon after that and it was then that I realized I just had an auto-body experience.

[Mikilt]

I was delighted when the candle burned out.

[tpa]

Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane.

[Blupiper]

Heard this one the other day (with apologies if it's a repeat): How do you track Will Smith in the snow? Follow the fresh prints.

JMB