Building Confidence - Slaying the "Ya Buts"

[Riverkilt]

Kiltedfirepiper pointed out on another thread that he has gone confidently kilted into country and western bars, hard core biker bars, gay bars (as a straight man with his wife), and Mexico.

Got me to thinking back over other posts on this board. We've been kilted in some very unusual places - including places that would give many of us second thoughts - only have all turn out well and positive.

Thought it might help some of the men newer to kilting to pass on some of the unusual, wild, crazy, places we've gone kilted.

I'll add; the local jail, to court, a fighter squadron reunion, Navajo flea market on the reservation, and river rafting.

Next.... :-D

Ron

[prattw]

I recently wore my kilt to the Bat Mitsvah party of a long-time friend's daughter. Together with Spencer jacket (a waist-length tuxedo jacket, in my case with the satin-covered buttons replaced by the silver diamond-shaped buttons used on PCs) and fly plaid. Photographer's muttered comment as I walked in was "fantastic!" Apparently just the touch of bright color he needed. (Grant Ancient, essentially orange and dull green.) Got a few comments, none startling, all approving. Did NOT get asked the "what's under it?" question. I did get another comment from the gate sentry as we entered the base (was held in the local air base O-club). "My G-d, that just defines sharp looking."

Will Pratt

[davedove]

Well, let's see, probably the wildest place I've worn a kilt is to a gentleman's club one evening. I happen to know the DJ, so I hung out with him. I could have made some money that night, as the young ladies there were offering to tip for a peak.

[Jewddha]

High School!

[Mike1]

I like to wear mine into the pulpit every 3-4 Sundays or so.

[Planopiper]

High School!
__________________
~Mikhael

That's the bravest one.

[cavscout]

Cherokee Indian Reservation. You should see the faces when a white guy in a kilt starts speaking cherokee. ??:

[Alan H]

You know, High School is probably the most brutal of them all. To dare to be different....I mean REALLY different in High School is a gutsy thing. Everybody wants to be "different" in High School. The thing is, everybody winds up being different the same, you know what I mean.?

To wear a kilt to High School is REALLY being different, and that takes guts far beyond what it takes for me to wear one to work.

I, myself don't go to too many "edgy" locations. For me, I wear my kilt to work, to the pub (once in a blue moon) to church and to meetings of my sailing association. I've worn a kilt on stage, playing in my crossover Celtic/Jazz group. I've worn a kilt to the San Francisco Symphony, and to my local symphony's concerts as well as a number of other "not-necessarily-Scottish" cultural events.

Not very "edgy" I'm afraid. I guess the most oddball place I've worn mine is to the Port Townsend Wooden Boat Festival.

[RockyR]

I've worn them to Weddings and Funerals.
I've worn them to in a country bar, I've worn them to Irish bars
I've worn them to Lift weights, I've worn them to go jogging
I've worn them to strip clubs, I've worn them to pool halls
I've worn them to Work (even BEFORE I started USAK), I wear them around the house.
I've worn them Snowboarding, I've worn them to the beach.

The problem is... they should be worn anywhere you wear clothes. It shouldn't matter where you want to wear them as long as it's appropriate dress for the occasion (not wearing a kilt and t-shirt to as funeral).

[motorman4life]

Up until this year, I had only considered wearing my kilt to Highland Games and Scottish Festivals. It was not until I decided to get my first Utilikilt, that I considered kilts for everyday use. While waiting for a new kilt, there is an enormous urge to go out kilted, commonly referred to as "kilt jones." I started wearing my traditional tartan kilt out and about to abate this "jones" and I found I received fantastic responses from people.

The fear of the unknown is a huge dragon to slay, no matter how much you SAY you don't care what others think. In our culture, it takes a lot of confidence and courage to routinely go out kilted. The first time is the hardest. But, then you learn it is a positive experience 99.9% of the time and the rare confrontations or comments from dysfunctional people are far outweighed by the positive feedback.

My first outing was to Starbuck's for coffee and then lunch at a nearby restaurant with a girlfriend on "No Pants Day" this year and the fact that I could, if necessary, refer people to www.nopantsday.com was a huge comfort. I decided that day to start my website www.kiltday.com. I have gotten a lot of positive response from guys that carry my website at the ready, a quick and easy response, as well as those that have sucessfully used it with friends, relatives and total strangers, when asked or confronted.

Since May, I have gone everywhere in my kilt. Other than at work, where I wear a uniform, I wear a kilt about 90% of the time. My usual response to questions is that "it is comfortable and if my balls are happy, I am happy!" When people ask me what I'm wearing under my kilt, I usually ask them what they are wearing under their pants/skirt/dress and in most cases, they don't respond back. Frequently, they get a shocked look and say it is rude to ask them such a thing.. to which I just laugh and point out the irony that they asked first. I have slapped plenty of hands on unexpected kilt check attempts and I have pointed out that it would be criminal if I were to do that to them (if it is a woman) or their wife (if it is a man).

My best experience was wearing a kilt on Bourbon Street in July. That included strip clubs, bars, lounges and cafes. My buddy wore jeans and by 6 pm, he said he regretted that he did not have a kilt. It was unbelievable all of the positive attention I got. I had been down Bourbon Street before and it was 1000% better in a kilt!

Last month, I was wearing a UK at a motorcycle shop in Tacoma and some biker unexpectedly lifted my kilt from behind before I could react (and my hands were full anyhow). He was surrounded by several friends and I asked them if they knew their macho friend was gay. He replied, "Hell No, I ain't gay!" I said sharply, "I wasn't asking you.. you already proved your preference by lifting my kilt. There are 3 women in dresses within arm's reach and you chose to molest me. I don't lift men's kilts or women's skirts, not just because it is technically a sex crime, but because I was raised better." His face was so beet red. I actually thought he was going to start crying. His friends were like jackals, haranguing him about being gay and one jokingly said he would call the cops for me, if I wanted. I just laughed and walked away. Later he came over to me and my girlfriend and said he was sorry.

Like I said, most experiences are positive and the challenge is, turning those few situations that COULD turn out negative, into positive ones. Keep in mind that many times, people don't know how to react and for some reason, they feel compelled to speak out. It is as if you are intentionally challenging their perception of the world and they feel they must say or do something about it. Many times, I have heard what could have been taken as a negative comment (like, "What the hell!?" or "Oh, my God!". I have responded in a positive way and they mellow out completely. If you go into it with a positive approach, you can usually quell their apprehension.

Comfort, fashion, heritage, attention/recognition.. they all play a part in my choice to wear a kilt. I can walk into 1000 bars or clubs in pants, slacks, shorts or even swimming trunks and a top hat and I would not get noticed. Outside of the United Kingdom, I can walk into any bar in a kilt and people there will probably remember me forever. If you are a straight guy, the best part is, there are a lot of women out there that have some sort of kilt fetish (some don’t know it until they meet you in your kilt!). When you run into them, it makes it all worth it!

For more, please check out my website http://www.kiltday.com and feel free to give me any input, comments. I know there are a few guys that have business cards printed up with a couple of great pro-kilt sites to give out to those that inquire. Feel free to use kiltday.com for that purpose. I hope to make it a positive pro-kilt site, packed with information, links and resources for all men brave enough to go out kilted.