soliciting submissions for:

[Alan H]

...The soon to be Pulitzer-Prize-winning pamphlet

So Your man is wearing a Kilt
A Short Guide: Facts, Fallacies and Philosophy
for the Hesitant Significant Other

OK, here are guidelines for writing something up. Remember who this pamphlet is written for!!!

For the Men

1. you can't be a professional kiltmaker, for obvious reasons...you're a biased author.
2. you need to have been wearing kilts "on a semi-regular basis" (you interpret that how you will) for at least six months. If "semi-regular basis" means six times a year to you, then fine. If it means six days a week...your call.
3. One page of text in the word processor of your choice, font size 12, font Times New Roman. Anything longer than one page will be brutally and insensitively edited into ugly, Neanderthal-level drooling.
4. Must include one picture of you in a kilt, a comfortable size for a reader to view, which fits into the one page of text. eg; text plus picture fills up one page.

For the Women

1. Anything goes in terms of profession and "kilted experience". This is one of the perks of being female, this time around, eh? Other women will really want to hear what YOU have to say (I think).
2. One page of text in the word processor of your choice, font size 12, font Times New Roman. Anything longer than one page will be brutally and insensitively edited.
4. Must include one picture of you and your kilt-wearing male person....husband, boyfriend, dad, kid, whatever. It must be a comfortable size for a reader to view, which fits into the one page of text.

Kiltmakers

I'd be up for adding an "appendix" concerning a bit of kilt history and construction information written by a kiltmaker or two as well. If the whole thing (not including appendices) is about 10-12 pages, then two pages of history and a "view from the industry" is probably about right.

Deadline: Friday October 21st, at 5:00PM Pacific Time

Just a suggestion... I think that this should focus on philabeigs, not Great Kilts or Ancient Kilts. Not too many guys will consider wearing a Great Kilt around to work at the Bank of America, or down to the hardware store on Saturday afternoon. However, if I'm wrong on this, write otherwise!!

Cut and paste your text into this thread here at X Marks, and then watch for further instructions from me or Shay by PM or e-mail sometime shortly after the 21st.

What to write:

Suggestions:

Name, age, job status.... part of the country you live in, nature of your connection to Scotland, if any.

What kind of kilt(s) you wear. How many do you own? How did you get into kilt-wearing? What is/are the three (or four or five) main reasons you wear a kilt?

That could take perhaps 1/3 of a page. The rest should be your comments addressing some of the keen issues that "nervous" or "unsupportive" spouses/SO's will have.

Do you wear a kilt to work? How did the first few days go? Has kilt wearing affected your career? The work issue is a big one for a lot of SO's.

Do you wear a kilt "around town" ? Do you wear it primarily to Scottish-associated activities? Why or why not?

Do people treat you differently when you wear a kilt? In what way do they treat you differently? Do men give you a hard time about wearing a kilt? Do women give you a hard time about it? Do women "hit on you" when you wear a kilt? Do you get the "where are the bagpipes?" question? Do you get the "underwear" question? How do you respond to these questions?

Ladies, I'm sure you can think of your own slant on all of these questions, as well. I have no doubt whatsoever that you will think of great things to write that would never cross our (the male) mind.

All of us: You may not be able to answer all these questions or address all these issues. Perhaps you need to pick just two or three and write about them and leave the rest for someone else.

Remember that what you're doing is writing a short treatise that shows that

A. you're not a flippin' nut case (unless you ARE a flippin' nut case!!)
B. you understand that some SO's will have issues with their partners wearing kilts. You are sharing information and your personal experiences, not passing judgement.

Let's see how this goes, and if we get a dozen or more responses, including 3-4-5 from women, perhaps we can make a pdf out of the document and have Hank make it available for download from the site.

Alan

[Shay]

PS- Also, if you guys could post some of the concerns your spouses/SOs have had (luckily my mind doesn't run along the line of objections!) please post 'em in list form here and I'll do my best to answer them from a women's perspective in a short essay.

[Alan H]

My wifes...as she has stated them... concerns/objections are:

Work... will wearing kilts adversely affect my position in my job?

Kilts are skirts. To her, they're feminine. She doesn't like her husband looking "girly" in a skirt and she's concerned that others will think the same. She hasn't said anything about that reflecting on HER, and I honestly don't think that's a big issue.

[KiltedCodeWarrior]

Alan,

Any reason for those of us who are newly kilted not to respond? I saw you qualified your male responses as being kilted for more than 6 months, but I would expect anybody who had been kilted that long is well past issues with their SO. I certainly expect to be! Either with full support, or an agreement on when it is appropriate to wear it that we can both agree to.

IMO, by the time you have been wearing a kilt for 6 months or more, your SO will have come to accept it, or you may have moved on to another SO. It is the early wearing of the kilt that seems to me to be the problem

RJI

[Steeplechase]

True, but the guys who have successfully nagivated the rough waters know what needs to be said. Those of use that are going thru the difficulty are the ones that are failing to address the concerns properly.

[Jewddha]

I don't feel I meet what you're looking for, but if you're ever after a "youth perspective" (specifically high school or that age range), I'm about. ;)

[KiltedCodeWarrior]

True, but the guys who have successfully nagivated the rough waters know what needs to be said. Those of use that are going thru the difficulty are the ones that are failing to address the concerns properly.

Steeplechase, maybe I misinterpreted it but Alan's topics for the men does not refer to a specific time kilted, and since this arose from another topic regarding just our SO's responses to us goiing kilted, I thought that us newbies would have some good input. I also think that those of us who have been lucky enough to convince our wives to embrace (or at least accept) out kiltedness ealy woud have some positive ideas, but I will defer to Alan, as this is his show.

RJI

[Alan H]

KCW, there's no question that you, and other guys with "less than six months" under your sporrans have good things to say. I mean, I'm only going on about 9 months o fkilt-wearing, now. I do not in the slightest think that people who are new to kilts are inarticulate or lack insight. But here's how my thinking goes...

Who is the pamphlet written for? Honestly...your wife....and my wife, and a bunch of other peoples wives and girlfriends who just aren't too sure about all of this kilt stuff, yet.

OK, with that in mind, whose thoughts are going to carry more weight...someone who is "new" to kilts, or someone who has been wearing them for years? Whose views are going to be of more interest to a woman who thinks that her guy very well may have gone off the deep end, and is wearing skirts? Who, some guy who ALSO has gone off the deep end, or a woman whose man has worn kilts for a couple of years or more?

I mean. OF COURSE the guy who has just gotten into kilts is a freaking nut case. HE WEARS KILTS fer cripes sake. He's got three strikes against him, and he hasn't even swung at the ball, yet! He's just like her husband/boyfriend who is doing something crazy and unexpected and has her worried he's gone fruit-loopy.

In fact, I think that six months is too short, I'd like to see words from guys who've been wearing kilts for three years or longer, but even here on X Marks, that's a pretty small population.

Your wife and my wife don't want to hear from a bunch of X Marks members about how great it is to wear kilts. No, they want to hear from other **women** about what THEY think about THEIR men wearing kilts. I'm hoping that 2/3rds of this little pamphlet will be stuff written by women, not men. I'm hoping that only 2-3 guys write something up and 4-5 women write. For example, I'd LOVE to hear from Graham's wife about her thoughts and experiences. Graham?

Barb, Shay, Sherry, Cyndi, Iolanthe.... my wife is ten times more interested in reading what they have to say about kilts, maybe with insight from a couple of guys with years of wearing kilts under their sporrans. My wife doesn't want to hear from some guy...LIKE ME...who's been wearing kilts for five months. She's got that already.. Me!

See my point?

[KiltedCodeWarrior]

Alan,

Point well made! If I had been able to make my wife comfortable with it already, then I would not be planning on sending her here to see the finished work! I think I might have her take a look and share some of her questions and concerns.

And I agree that the SO's of those who have been wearing the kilt for years will provide much more perspective.

RJI

[Sherry]

I can't help from a career perspective. There's no way my DH will go kilted to work. He wears suits & is in a financial environment. One of the GA's at the agency is a total nut case: he is paranoid & a sociopathic bully. The less attention drawn from him, the better.

But...some day we shall be free! I think the kilt plus jacket & tie look is very smart. <Sigh> We must live in hope.

Sherry