Nice????

[GMan]

Hell-o all,

In a conversation today that really had no bearing on kilt wearing, it was mentioned that is being nice all that bad? Well it got me to think about how we react to others and some of the comments that we are asked.

Do we find it hard to gauge what others are saying as a slam or as a serious and honest question?

I know that some have expressed disgust with the "question" only to find out later that for all intensive purposes the one who asks the question is sincere in asking. I must admit that I find that I catch myself with disgust and later regret how I came across.

So I am asking how do we come across nicely in our comments without offending others? Or letting those who want to "slam" us for being different?

[KiltedCodeWarrior]

Hell-o all,

In a conversation today that really had no bearing on kilt wearing, it was mentioned that is being nice all that bad? Well it got me to think about how we react to others and some of the comments that we are asked.

Do we find it hard to gauge what others are saying as a slam or as a serious and honest question?

I know that some have expressed disgust with the "question" only to find out later that for all intensive purposes the one who asks the question is sincere in asking. I must admit that I find that I catch myself with disgust and later regret how I came across.

So I am asking how do we come across nicely in our comments without offending others? Or letting those who want to "slam" us for being different?

Helloo GMan,
I think that yor question is valid if we respond with a knee jerk response to "the question" without listening to both what is being asked and the tone of voice. If we reply, as had been stated on other posts, with a cynical, flip, or sarcastic comment, then we have automatically changed the tone of the conversation, regardless of their intent. However, if we truly listen, and don't assume it is about us wearing a kilt, then we can tailor our response to what was asked and how. I like to think that I am "nice" in all my public conversations, but sometimes that means matching the tone of what was asked.

Good question though! Should prove very thought provoking.

[Archangel]

In a cosmic flux, I was in a similar conversation and quoted a line from a song, "when did being a goody two-shoes become a bad thing?".
Selah.

[Jerry]

Other than games and such, I only wear my kilt out a couple of times a month, and I haven't had anything but a few positive comments. I hope my response to any of the comments we get would be polite. If anyone ever says "Nice skirt" to me I plan to respond with "Thank you, but it's a kilt", then go on to explain the difference and about cultural heritage and such. That way I figure that if they were just trying to pull my chain, I might be able to talk them to death, and if they were really interested, they might learn something.

[davedove]

I think it's wrong in any situation to assume an insult, when with a bit of consideration it can be determined that none was intended. Instead, we should treat it as an opportunity to educate. If you give people the benefit of the doubt, you never know, you may find a new friend.