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16th July 08, 05:08 PM
#1
nervous in my kilt
Okay, so I have 2 kilts now and have worn them around the house, on a road trip and to walk the dog in the wee hours of the morning,...yesterday, I decided to wear my new sport kilt over to the local park while walking the dog,..I became very self-conscious, which surprised,..I found myself avoiding folks and waiting for some sort of slur to be thrown my way,...I was surprised, but can't imagine I'm the only one who has experienced this. How do other folks deal with this anxiety/sense of sticking out etc?
Nothing adverse happened to me, but I was glad to get home
thx--Mac
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16th July 08, 05:44 PM
#2
It takes a while to get used to it. I was lucky, my brother and nephew preceded me in kilts. But I remember the first time I left the house in one, I was a little nervous, but I just strode out like I was in total charge.
A lot of feeling comfortable is "psyching" yourself into an attitude that what you're doing is perfectly normal (it is) and going about your business.
Also, I would recommend reading some of the threads about how to answer questions and comments about the kilt. I had a few of them ready to respond with and was able to sound confident when I did get comments. That made me feel better prepared to go out in my kilt.
Animo non astutia
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16th July 08, 05:48 PM
#3
I understand the feeling. The first time I wore one of my kilts out in public was to a my company bowling league. The only advice I can give is just act like you have been there before. People are naturally going to stare, but surprisingly many men will ask questions or tell you that it is cool and women are even more supportive.
I have since worn my kilts to family gatherings and I actually wore it to work both last Friday and this Monday. I just got a few more and am wearing one of the new ones to work tomorrow. You will get the whole skirt comment and you may even be asked "When you are coming out of the closet?" - not that there is anything wrong with that, but you just have to be sure of yourself and either laugh with them (reverse psychology) or ignore them. As long as you are sure of yourself it will be OK. I just figure that they are jealous that they don't have the, lets say 'guts' to wear one themselves. Trust me it gets easier after a few times because you become more comfortable with it yourself.
Just remember the slightly modified Devo song lyrics;
Now kilt it
Into Shape
Shape it up
Get straight
Go Forward
Move ahead
Try to detect it
Its not to late
To Kilt it
Kilt it good
Enjoy the freedom,
Will
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16th July 08, 05:54 PM
#4
Mcfarkus has spoken the essential point, here: confidence.
Go out into the world, in your kilt, with head held high.
If you act like it's no big deal, so will everyone else.
Chances are, you will be more sharply dressed than most people around you!
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16th July 08, 05:56 PM
#5
Originally Posted by McFarkus
It takes a while to get used to it. I was lucky, my brother and nephew preceded me in kilts. But I remember the first time I left the house in one, I was a little nervous, but I just strode out like I was in total charge.
A lot of feeling comfortable is "psyching" yourself into an attitude that what you're doing is perfectly normal (it is) and going about your business.
Also, I would recommend reading some of the threads about how to answer questions and comments about the kilt. I had a few of them ready to respond with and was able to sound confident when I did get comments. That made me feel better prepared to go out in my kilt.
Well said. You just have to exude confidence. I have had very few negative comments made to me whilst kilted. If I remember correctly almost all of those comments were made behind my back. Go figure.
If someone asks why you're wearing the kilt, just tell them "Some of us need more room than others." and walk away while they think about it.
The more you wear it the less of an issue it will become.
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16th July 08, 06:00 PM
#6
The only advise I can give is to get out there and do it, the more you do it the easier it is. I've been wearing one daily for over a year now and I will say that the comments have gone from teasing to compliments as I've grown more comfortable and confident. I am sure that my coworkers or my family would be shocked if I were to show up in pants, but then why would I do that.
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16th July 08, 06:11 PM
#7
For starters - take a deep breath and relax. Many of us started our kilted lives much like you. The funny thing is - most of our nervousness turns out to be a waste of time. Start with a few short excursions and build on them. The more you wear your kilt the more relaxed you'll be wearing your kilt.
If you are like me, you will soon discover that - if you get comments at all - they will be 95% flattering and as you become more comfortable in your kilt, people will sense your confidence and admire it.
Oh yeah - take a look at my "tag line" - Val said it all...
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16th July 08, 06:28 PM
#8
It takes a few days, but it goes away soon, and the first time a young lady comes up and says "Um, that looks really good on you", you'll never worry about it again :-)
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16th July 08, 06:40 PM
#9
Confidence, confidence, confidence (even if you are "faking" it). After a while, you WON'T be faking the confidence.
Don
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16th July 08, 06:46 PM
#10
If you really enjoy and are comfortable wearing a kilt you need to be at a point where your comfort is more important than what others think.
People have many paradigms. Changing/adjusting paradigms takes consistency and time. I am 44 and I have met more people older than me that do not mind (and/or like) the kilt than those younger than me. I live in the very northwest corner of Ohio and it is very conservative. When I wear a kilt in public it is a big needle across the record (there is an old analogy). Yet at the same time I have met people that truly appreciate that I am willing to wear something different, yet perhaps not alien. I believe that some of the acceptance is that the kilt is not new. If I tried to wear pink mini skirt it would probably would be much, much different (if that happens somebody should shoot me). My best friend's wife expects to see me in a kilt because to her it states that I am comfortable with myself.
Due to my profession I am currently unable to wear a kilt at the office. However, this is a challenge that I have not given up on. It is that I would rather work smoothly and slowly and be granted permission rather than make a demand that could burn bridges.
I am just rambling here, but I do have another question. Besides wearing a kilt what else might others consider unique about you? I drive a 1981 and two 1985 Mercedes diesels. I hate the newer cars and yet I design and develop engine components for new cars. Before I began wearing a kilt people at work already considered me odd. People at work expect that I should have a membership to the local country club (I hate golf) and drive a new Cadillac (oh, puke). Something else that may be unique about you may be minor in the minds of others when compared to wearing a kilt.
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