Proper attire for a funeral

[Paul]

not wishing to spoil the party so to speak, but consider this, a funeral is not about you, it's a show of respect for the dearly departed and the family and friends they left behind.
In Scotland it's not the norm to wear the kilt to a funeral, unless the deceased themselves either wore a kilt, loved the tartan or was highly patriotic.
I would personally consider every aspect, did your friends father admire your wearing of the kilt, if so wear it for that reason, if on the other hand he never saw you wearing the kilt, then perhaps on this one occassion wear clothing that will fit in with the rest of the mourners.
or put simply, do you really want to stand out amongst the crowd and steal the centre of attention at this sad occassion.
Perhaps ask the approval of your friend ?

Chris

Chris. That's so true, but I wish this wasn't the case. Most people do see a kilt as a way of standing out and more often than not, only for striking formal attire. In our neck of the woods people probably will never overcome this, which is disappointing. I'd love for people to wear whatever they like to my funeral as this would respect my acknowledgement of peoples' personal identity, which I honor.
Have you ever worn a kilt to a lowland funeral?
To be honest, for every funeral I've attended the deceased would have loved to know that someone was kilted at their sending off, so I don't know why people often frown upon this, especially when a black kilt, black hose, black jacket, white shirt and black tie could easily be worn.

[lasrl]

From someone who has worn a kilt to a few funerals, I'd say wear a white shirt and wool tie in a solid colour that picks up one of the colours of the kilt. For example something like this:

I just want to comment on that rug, as it reminds me of my childhood and playing at my grandparents house, where I believe that they used to have one identical to it. I believe that my uncle has it now. Where would one get another rug, similar to that one anyway?

[McMurdo]

I just want to comment on that rug, as it reminds me of my childhood and playing at my grandparents house, where I believe that they used to have one identical to it. I believe that my uncle has it now. Where would one get another rug, similar to that one anyway?

I wish I new, I got this from my Aunt and Uncle,it came from Scotland not sure if they brought it over or got it on a visit, they may have ordered it. I will see if I can get any information on it.

Here is a close up

http://bp1.blogger.com/_Zt8JvhxwG8E/...h/100_2304.jpg

[SteveB]

I grew up with the same rug. It was bought by my parents at a museum shop in Scotland. I do not remember where, it was a way of raising funds for the museum.

This past Tuesday was the funeral for a young lass that was my nephews partner in life. I attended kilted with white shirt, black tie, and charcoal coloured jacket. I was way over dressed compared to most of the attendees. Her parents and I were the best dressed, and they thanked me for honouring their daughter by my effort to dress up. Her father thanked me for being kilted to honour her Scot heritage.

Slainte

[EagleJCS]

If you choose to wear the kilt, I also suggest going with a white shirt and dark tie.

I invariably wear a suit to funerals. Even when wearing a suit, I'm often dressed better than most others in my age range (I'm 40). For me it's a measure of respect not only for the departed, but also their family, friends, and church. I've seen some women wearing cocktail dresses, showing more decolletage than they should in the daytime (or at any time, in some cases ), but most especially not at a funeral. Other women look like they just rolled out of bed and put on whatever was clean. Many guys I've seen lately wear clothes that look like they came out of the hamper (*sniff* - hmm, doesn't smell dirty) or appear they couldn't be bothered to dress better than their lounging togs. (Polo shirt, bermuda shorts and sandals, anyone?)

I can't imagine wearing a kilt to a funeral that I wasn't piping at (and therefore likely not one of the mourners), unless the person were connected to a Scottish organization - Caledonian Society, Burns Society, St. Andrews Society, etc. - and/or a pipe band, and many other mourners would likely be wearing theirs as well.

Even if I'm only going to the visitation and not the funeral service, I'll usually put on a sport coat and tie.

[Redshank]

Chris. That's so true, but I wish this wasn't the case. Most people do see a kilt as a way of standing out and more often than not, only for striking formal attire. In our neck of the woods people probably will never overcome this, which is disappointing. I'd love for people to wear whatever they like to my funeral as this would respect my acknowledgement of peoples' personal identity, which I honor.
Have you ever worn a kilt to a lowland funeral?
To be honest, for every funeral I've attended the deceased would have loved to know that someone was kilted at their sending off, so I don't know why people often frown upon this, especially when a black kilt, black hose, black jacket, white shirt and black tie could easily be worn.

I have attended 4 funerals in the last couple of years here in the highlands, wore a dark suit at 2 of them, and a kilt at the other 2, but then 1 was the funeral of my best frend, a kilt maker, so it was inevitable that I wore a kilt made by him, the second was a mother of a patriot friend of mine, he asked that I wear my clan tartan at his mothers funeral.
I have never been to a lowland funeral, I dont know that many lowlanders well.
I agree, the kilt should be worn more often, after all it's the national dress, wearing it is a mark of respect for our nation, so if it's worn with respect then I see no reason why it shouldn't be worn in Scotland to a funeral.
I will be wearing one at mine that's for sure

[Jock Scot]

As some of you are interested in the Scots perspective ,Highland Scots in particular, on kilt wearing may I add this note. Most of the Highland Scots funerals that I have been too, I have worn the kilt, at no time have, or would I have, been expected to wear any tartan other than my own.This idea of wearing a dark tartan, particularly if it was not your own, would have the deceased turning in their grave and would have been regarded as an unnecessary and more importantly, uncomplimentary act by all concerned.

[Lyle1]

In your original posting, you did say that the funeral would be for your best friend's father. Does your friend know how what the kilt means to you? If your gut feeling is that it would be appropriate to wear a kilt, I think you should, but you are in a far better position to predict your friend's reaction than any of us.

[Kilted Rogue]

In your original posting, you did say that the funeral would be for your best friend's father. Does your friend know how what the kilt means to you? If your gut feeling is that it would be appropriate to wear a kilt, I think you should, but you are in a far better position to predict your friend's reaction than any of us.

She know how i feel about the kilt and wearing it. she i think will be ok with it.


Just to keep you all in the loop , the gentleman in question passed this morning. I will be on my way to Atlanta tomorrow for the services

[Tobus]

My condolences.