I am thinking of changing my last name. And since this is a very rare thing for a man to do, I wonder what you think of the idea. Basically, I want to use this thread to gauge public opinion/reaction to it. Why am I telling a bunch of internet strangers this? Because it's not something that my real-life acquaintances need to know about yet.

A little background first.

I was born with my father's English surname. My mother's maiden name is Kilpatrick (sept of clan Colquhoun, according to the family oral history). My mother was an only child, and she is the last of the Kilpatrick line for this branch of the family. My two brothers and I all carry our father's name.

Not to divulge too much personal stuff, but basically my father is not the kind of person I admire. He and my mother divorced when I was 3 years old, and I was raised by my mother and her parents: the Kilpatrick side of the family. Even as an adult, I feel no kinship with my father. He was never a father to me in any sense of the word other than genetic, nor is he even the kind of man I want to associate with. He is in his 5th marriage now (if I've kept track properly) and I haven't spoken with him in years. Yet I carry his name.

When I was 18, I seriously considered changing my name to Kilpatrick. Not only as an affront to my father (which was very important to me at the time) but to honor the Kilpatricks who raised me, as they are the kind of people I would admire even if we weren't related. I also wanted to carry on the Kilpatrick family name rather than let it die out. I spoke with my mother and grandparents about it at the time, and the idea made them very happy and hopeful. But, for one reason or another, I didn't follow through with it.

I considered it again in my early 30s, when my maternal grandfather died. He was the last male Kilpatrick in this line. But again, for whatever reason, I did not follow through. But now I am thinking about it again, and seriously this time. I no longer feel any need to do it as a "screw you" gesture to my father; in fact, I probably wouldn't even bother to tell him. The only satisfaction I'd get on that end would be separating his name from my identity so I can be done with it for good. But my main motivation with respect to my mother's side of the family remains the same. I'd like to honor them and carry on the family name myself. I'll leave it to my brothers to carry on my father's name if they wish.

Now, I know that there is some precedent for this even in Scottish tradition where a child is adopted by his mother's clan, for example. But it's not the kind of thing that very many people do these days (not grown men, at least). I feel my reasons are proper; I've obviously not rushed into this decision, and I should have the right to choose my identity instead of being stuck with one I'm ashamed of. My wife is very supportive of it as well; she understands and agrees with my reasons. My mother and grandmother (the last two Kilpatricks) still support it as well.

The process of changing one's name seems simple enough: it's a matter of appearing at the county courthouse and signing some papers. If the judge has no reason to deny it, your name is changed. Then there's a lot of work in getting the rest of society to recognize the new name (for example I have engineering licenses in 7 states that I'd have to get changed, plus my driver's license and concealed handgun license). Bank accounts, employer, phone company, IRS, Social Security Administration, life insurance, health insurance, post office, magazine subscriptions, and about a thousand other organizations or entities. That seems daunting. But I think in the end it will be worth it.

But... is it weird for a man to change his name? Does it automatically give rise to suspicion of criminal activity or "witness protection" type drama if you don't know the whole back story? Does it come across as trying to be someone else instead of who you were born? I've thought about this thing for so many years now that I don't really know how 'normal' people see it. Would you do it in the same circumstance? Or do you think a man should always keep the name he was born with, no matter what?