Military Wisdom

[ErikGarrett]

The best job for a new private or new lieutenant on an M1 Abrams it to take a piece of chalk and a ball peen hammer and spend the morning looking for soft spots in the armor. Once complete, jumping on the turret to check the shocks isn't a bad idea either.

[Charlie Mc.]

The scariest things in the Marine Corps:

1. A private saying "I learned this in bootcamp."
2. A second lieutenant saying "Based on my experience"
3. A Gunnery Sergeant nudging you and saying "watch this s***".

[Whidbey78]

The best job for a new private or new lieutenant on an M1 Abrams it to take a piece of chalk and a ball peen hammer and spend the morning looking for soft spots in the armor. Once complete, jumping on the turret to check the shocks isn't a bad idea either.

We used to have NUB's(Non-Useful Bodies) take "exhaust samples" from the jet--basically standing in the wash with a trashbag-- and take them to the lab at the med clinic for testing. Or send them to admin for an ID10T form...or send them to supply for fifty yards of flightline...or to HAZMAT for military bearing grease...or to the Ready Room for the keys to one of the planes...or to maintenance control for the key to the gust-lock...or to tell maintenance control that aircraft 702 needs a new "stick actuator"...or GU11 watch.

Those were fun, but if you didn't like the guy you could send him to the Chief's Mess to wash the coffee cups and coffee pot. That one never went over well with the khakis!! I think the bodies are buried on the golf course at North Island.

[Bill aka Mole]

Those were fun, but if you didn't like the guy you could send him to the Chief's Mess to wash the coffee cups and coffee pot. That one never went over well with the khakis!! I think the bodies are buried on the golf course at North Island.

Only the ones shore based at North Island... Well, maybe one or twelve off the carriers when they were inport. (But you never heard that from me. )

Skippys list will make this old Chief laugh... And find the flaws that Skippy never thought of!

I remember this one from the Engineering Spaces: It's always darkest just before the lights go out. And then it's really dark 'cuz your DCPO hasn't been checking his battle lanterns.

Scavenger list: 50 yards of waterline, keys to the seachest, relative bearing grease, batteries for the sound powered telephones.

Common but unusual questions:
How does the bridge always know that the man who fell overboard is named "Oscar?" ("Oscar" is the name of the maritime alphabet flag for the letter O.)

What three things does a diesel engine not need to run, but isn't considered running without them? (Noise, smoke and vibration.)

I have two U.S. coins in my pocket. Together, they equal 30 cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the two coins. (A nickel and a quarter. The quarter is not a nickel.)

Why can a Chief become an Officer but an Officer not become a Chief. (Chiefs have their own standards.)

What happened on the day that the LPO proved the Chief was wrong? (There was a new messdecks Master-at-Arms for the remainder of the deployment.)

[Coastie]

Common but unusual questions:
How does the bridge always know that the man who fell overboard is named "Oscar?" ("Oscar" is the name of the maritime alphabet flag for the letter O.)

I can tell you as a QMC the entire crew knew what was about to happen when I piped "SN Myers, lay to the bosunhole" Of course you would not find SN Oscar Myers anywhere on the sailing list. Never once got called on it by the riders at REFTRA.

[robdog1701]

Only the ones shore based at North Island... Well, maybe one or twelve off the carriers when they were inport. (But you never heard that from me. )

Skippys list will make this old Chief laugh... And find the flaws that Skippy never thought of!

I remember this one from the Engineering Spaces: It's always darkest just before the lights go out. And then it's really dark 'cuz your DCPO hasn't been checking his battle lanterns.

Scavenger list: 50 yards of waterline, keys to the seachest, relative bearing grease, batteries for the sound powered telephones.

Common but unusual questions:
How does the bridge always know that the man who fell overboard is named "Oscar?" ("Oscar" is the name of the maritime alphabet flag for the letter O.)

What three things does a diesel engine not need to run, but isn't considered running without them? (Noise, smoke and vibration.)

I have two U.S. coins in my pocket. Together, they equal 30 cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the two coins. (A nickel and a quarter. The quarter is not a nickel.)

Why can a Chief become an Officer but an Officer not become a Chief. (Chiefs have their own standards.)

What happened on the day that the LPO proved the Chief was wrong? (There was a new messdecks Master-at-Arms for the remainder of the deployment.)

Chief, you forgot one on the scavenger list - One Bosun's punch, please.

[Bill aka Mole]

Chief, you forgot one on the scavenger list - One Bosun's punch, please.

Nope, I was an engineer. Ours were BT/MM/HT punches. But the department you were in would show when you were sent out. Like the time we sent a man with nine children out for fallopian tubes on the carrier. He met a lot of above the hanger deck folks that day. And reportedly got lost (several times) and found the Admirals quarters three times. Those of us involved in the division had our opportunity to ask for forgiveness as each of us were sent to those same quarters as movie projectionists for a week each. I guess the Admiral really didn't like movies as he had the only dual projector setup on the ship and the changeover didn't work quite right.

[rdjmchris]

When I got to Vicenza, Italy waaayyy back in the day. I got sent for canopy lights, the keys to the North 40 (our on-post "training area"), squelch grease and the duty roster to feed the Blue Falcon (we were the Blue Falcons - 3rd Battalion, 325th Airborne Battalion Combat Team). The last one gave it away.